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Why do we fall in love? A Biological POV
We see love everywhere, on the street, on social media, in TV series and movies, and many times we ask ourselves why we can’t have a love like that. Of course, we know that to be in love with someone, they have to be someone we share interests with, who we find physically attractive, and who makes us feel on cloud nine. But, have you ever wondered if falling in love with someone has a necessary biological background?
Falling for someone is not purely psychological, believe it or not, biology also plays a crucial role when it comes to falling head over heels. Four neurochemicals are associated with love and attraction: oxytocin, dopamine, serotonin, and beta-endorphin. Oxytocin is critical when attracted to someone because it tranquilizes our amygdala, the fear center of our brain, which means we are confident when talking to the one we like.It is
released when we hold hands or have a gentle kiss. Dopamine releases at the same time as oxytocin. It is a way to reward our body when we are doing something we enjoy, in this case, our confidence for making acquaintance with our crush. Our sense of smell is also involved in this hormone’s release. If we have a great time with someone whose smell we enjoy and are attracted to, our dopamine system will perceive this as a reward worth seeking again. Dopamine also motivates us to make a move, and working with oxytocin makes it easier to remember facts and important information about this new person. These chemicals' primly act in the unconscious part of the brain because attraction is initially instinctive.
Next, we have Serotonin. Have you ever heard the expression “ I’m so in love I can’t eat or sleep”? Well, that is because of Serotonin. In the beginning stages of love, our levels of serotonin drop, which makes us lose our appetite, have insomnia, and be overwhelmed with thoughts regarding our new relationship. Finally, there are beta-endorphins. These hormones are the ones that make us capable of long-term love. Oxytocin is not strong enough to underpin a stable relationship, because it mainly regards physical attraction, which is where beta-endorphins come in. Beta-endorphins act somehow like an opiate: it makes love addictive. That is why, when we are deeply in love with someone, we can't imagine life without them and never want to be apart. Beta-endorphins promote love in both the conscious and unconscious parts of the brain, meaning we can experience love as an instinctive drive or emotion involving pleasure, but also as a process involving emotions like empathy, trust, and attention.
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Falling in love is something we all experience at least once in our life, and biology plays a crucial role in this feeling. Falling head over heels for someone is not as easy as saying: “I’m in love with you,” there is a complex biological process behind it. Who knew biology was the mastermind behind the curtain?